Feb 282013

I read a lot about commitment on BJJ posts.  I see a lot of inspiring posts and posters suggesting that excellence is about prioritizing and that if you want to be successful, you figure out a way to make it happen.

I’m not going to lie.  That makes me feel kind of bad, because over the last several months (really, over a year), I’ve had a terrible time getting things together.  Many weeks, it’s just the three kids and me at home, as my wife travels frequently for work.  Two kids in high school and a pre-schooler keeps me on my toes.  My older kids are great.  They would be more than happy watching their younger sister for me while I go to class.   And the truth is, I don’t want to be THAT guy… the guy that comes to mind when people think about committing to training.  Or the guy who comes to mind when people talk about how many people disappear before they get to black belt.

But here’s what goes through my mind.  It’s very practical.  First, what’s for dinner?  My kids can cook, but that doesn’t mean that they will, and Lily will end up eating Mac n’Cheese or something like that for dinner.  The second, is the home work done?  Finally, after many other questions I get to the meat of the issue, which is where the parental guilt thing kicks in.  I don’t like the idea of my older kids raising my youngest.  It’s not their job, and I don’t think it’s fair.  This isn’t to say that I don’t leave them in charge.  I do, often.  It’s that, once it’s institutionalized, it’s becomes a primary role, instead of support.  If that makes any sense at all.

All of that said, Coach Bing said, “Bring Lily down to the school.  She’ll be fine.”  And I think we’re going to give that a shot.  I miss training regularly and I enjoy it when I go.  But, man, juggling my other obligations is rough.  I actually had every intention of packing Lily in the car and heading to class Wednesday, but found out after I got home that my son had a band concert that night.  He’s a great communicator, like all teenage boys.  So, class starts at 5:30 pm and I found out at about 4:45 pm that he had to be at the school in his tuxedo at 6:30 pm.  And he hadn’t eaten dinner, nor had he done his homework.

So, Friday…  the goal will be to pack Lily in the car and head to class.  We’ll see if I can make that happen.  I think I can… I think I can.

Other news:  Smoothie for today:

  • 1 1/2 bananas (Lily ate the other half)
  • 1 pear
  • 1 cup (about) of frozen fruit (strawberries/blueberries/blackberries)
  • 1 tbsp Hemp Protein
  • 1 tbsp flax seed
  • about 2 cups of broccoli
  • 2 hands full of spinach and arugula
  • almond milk (unsweetened and unflavored)

Turned out great.  The berries turned it from a bright green to a kind of purple color, but the taste is good.  The arugula actually gives it a kind of butter flavor which I like, but might be a matter of taste.

  4 Responses to “Best Laid Plans”

Comments (4)

    I feel lucky I don’t have kids yet, because I know once I do, that’ll be my main concern. Good luck though! I was planning on heading out there next week to train! Will you be at the Revo?


      I’ll be there, Tyy. See you then, I’m sure! You competing? I’ll be helping Jeff.

      Hey, what day are you going to be visiting? Let me know and I’ll try to get there for sure.


    I completely understand the sentiment expressed in this post. In fact, I wrote about similar thoughts a while back: http://bjj-law-living.blogspot.com/2012/01/your-priorities-are-yours.html

    Of course, I mentioned in that post that I would go back to BJJ after law school was done. It turned out, I could not stay away that long, and I recently started back. I am thrilled to be back on the mats. But, it is always a delicate balance.

    Good luck! I hope you find the best balance for both you and your family!


      Kate, thanks for the comment. I can’t tell you how glad I am to know that I’m not alone. Also, as I mentioned on your blog, I’m glad to hear that you’re back on the mats.

      On the plus side, my four year old is pretty excited at the idea of hanging out at the school. Hopefully, it works out and I can start training regularly again. I know that it’s good for me, and I feel better all the way around when I am on the mats at least three times each week.

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